Since we are in Göteborg, Sweden to celebrate Pride, there is no better place to stay than the Dorsia Hotel.
“At Dorsia, every room is a surprise. Dreamy carpe diem beds suitable for kings and queens. This is the place where you cannot wait to go to bed, with bed cloths of mulberry silk and bed linen of handmade egyptian cotton. Everything, with the purpose to give you a new kind of exclusivity.
Each of our 37 rooms is a kingdom in itself. equally beautiful, equally comfortable. All different.”
Even better, “Children allowed from 8 years. Baby strollers not allowed.” Sweet.
I wonder if bird droppings are a problem…
The Dorsia Hotel is located on Trädgårdsgatan street, an unassuming building with a large nest holding large eggs, because of course. Hmmmm, those eggs do look pretty good, don’t they?
Spring is busting out all over!
I didn’t know it, but there are small luxury hotels that are part of “Small Luxury Hotels of the World.”
Let’s go inside and see what this is all about, shall we?
Bond. James Bond.
This slightly-blurred photograph shows the lobby from one of the upstairs areas, and includes four members of the Dorsia staff. Yes, they all look and dress like that.
Our Room
Upon arrival, we are greeted and escorted to our room. We ride the slow elevator with our luggage, and our hostess takes the stairs, arriving at our floor before we do. Very sneaky!
Not meant for the color-blind.
An issue with every place we stay in Sweden and Norway is the size of the rooms, even when we stay in Airbnbs. Everything is compact by US standards, and there is ever enough closet space (some places we stay have no closet space at all).
However, once you get past that, it’s a charming room, complete with a book on Salvador Domingo Felipe Jacinto Dalí i Domènech, Marquess of Dalí of Púbol.
I must speak with the designer about this…
We have tea, coffee, water, and wine, plus fruit and a bowl of chocolates. For some reason, there is an additional chair. The large pot of flowers, although pretty, prevents us from seeing each other and from using the table, so we put those out on our balcony. We move the chair to the other side of the room.
Only four chocolate balls!
Utensils are provided so that we can have a civilized snack. Note that there were more chocolate balls when we arrived, but, in deference to their customs, we consumed them. Well, if eating chocolate balls is not a custom, it should be.
It’s the little things…
The design of the tea cups match the design of the tea saucers, and the cups are aligned perfectly.
Nothing to whine about.
An assortment of wine is provided. No, it’s not free, but it’s very convenient. Sweden doesn’t make it easy to purchase alcohol. “Systembolaget is a nationwide, government-owned chain of off-licences in Sweden. Systembolaget stores are the only places in Sweden apart from bars, restaurants and night-clubs where strong alcoholic beverages can be purchased.” Note that it’s the same in Norway, but their system is called Monopol, as in monopoly. At least they are up-front about it.
Yes, there are a lot of colors in this room.
As with many bathrooms in Europe, there are no countertops, so Dorsia Hotel provided a separate table. It doesn’t leave much room for our things, but we adjust.
We don’t need no stinkin’ shower curtains.
Showering tends to be a splashy affair, that’s for sure. More on the bathtub later…
What’s the towel for?
A history lesson: Back in ancient times, people did not bring telephones into the bathroom when using the toilet. It was considered gauche. Still, there was not much to do while nature took its time to get things finished. Thus, folks would bring reading materials with them, such are magazines and newspapers, to help pass the time. Therefore, the Dorsia Hotel graciously provides a reading light for just that sort of genteel living.
Now I get it.
And if you still aren’t sure what to do on the commode, a nymph provides a delicate hint.
A king-size bed, Scandinavian style.
Let’s leave the bathroom and return to the room.
Notice the handmade quilt; it’s actually two quilts the size of one king-size quilt, which means that you can hog the quilt and no one cares. The pillows are filled with “the finest mulberry silk”. I try to build a pillow fort, but there aren’t enough big ones.
But wait, there’s more.
That column of light is more than a window; it is a door to our private balcony (the only one at the Hotel Dorsia).
Let’s take a look.
Private Balcony
There are no muted colors here.
The balcony is a nice place to enjoy a glass of wine or, say, have a photoshoot. 😀
Focus!
If we are going to have a fun photoshoot, we might as well do it from the perspective of a voyeur. At least, that’s what I think…
Uh, oh, we’ve been spotted.
Our unsuspecting Swedish sunbather, disappointed with the lack of sun and the coolness of the afternoon, decides to return to her room, when she notices a gentleman enjoying the view.
A bit windy, is it?
As with any Swedish girl, she has few inhibitions concerning her body, even when an unexpected breeze favors the gentleman.
Oh, wait.
The gentleman realizes it is not a breeze at all, but the coy flirtations of a lusty girl. Oh, my.
It’s a bit nippy out today.
The sunbather adjusts her towel-of-many-colors and, with a come-hither glance, leaves the balcony.
Fade to black….
Breakfast
Dining at the Dorsia Hotel is a tiny bit more elegant than all-you-can-eat at Denny’s.
Everything is pretty at the Dorsia.
There are no ordinary rooms at the Dorsia Hotel, so you would not expect breakfast to be any different.
I’ll have one of those, and one of those, and….
There is an assortment of food that we don’t recognize beyond “that’s probably sweet” or “some kind of fish”. As with all the breakfasts we have in Scandinavia, alcohol is included; sadly, we are not morning drinkers.
Breakfast, Dorsia-style.
Bread, beans, eggs, bacon, salami, cucumber, mushroom, salmon, cheese, leafy greens, OJ, and, of course, coffee.
We apparently rented out the entire hotel.
Breakfast turns out to be a private affair. Just as we like it to be.
The view from the other side.
And this, my friends, is what dining should be like: quiet elegance.
Rooms
Of course, this is not the only place one can find quiet elegance at the Dorsia Hotel.
We read to say we’ve read.
This is one of the nooks at the Dorsia Hotel where a traveler can relax with a good book, a good number of which are located in bookcases in said nooks.
Yes, each room at the Dorsia Hotel is unique.
Art
You have probably noticed that the rooms have an abundance of art works.
It’s a lounge and it’s an art gallery.
In fact, every wall seems to be an opportunity to display fine works of art.
But it’s not all paintings.
This is your classic “Woman in Bondage, Stretching”. Notice the candles; they are real, and kept burning throughout the day.
A statuesque woman.
Yes, there are actual statues here, seemingly with the theme of women stretching.
I like big hips and I cannot lie.
In a corner of the lobby is this dress made for a woman with an impossibly small waist and enormous legs. Wrong.
You’ve heard of edible panties, right?
A plaque near the dress tells us, “The sculpture is dipped in sugar.” Of course it is, because this is the Dorsia Hotel!
Yes, the Dorsia Hotel is awash with fine art. Enjoy!
Maybe it’s a circus ship.
“When the father, Bengt, later launched Gothenburg’s first great gourmet restaurant – Sofus, after grandfather – on the corner of Kungsportsavenyn and Engelbrektsgatan, he commissioned a theatre decorator and metalworker to produce the restaurant sign. The result was a strange contraption made of copper, representing – what exactly? A ship? A circus? The creation remains subject to interpretation and now sits on the brick wall of the Dorsia’s inner courtyard and orangery.”
Speaking of inner courtyard…
The roof is supposed to look like that.
There is inner courtyard that serves food and drink. I don’t know where the orangery is.
Mmmmmm, fish in a can.
We do enjoy a small snack in the inner courtyard, which includes salty, oily fish in a can.
Wine
All restaurants have wine.
The Wine Room.
If you wander through the hotel, looking in every room, eventually you discover the wine room. This appears to be more of an artwork than an actual wine cellar, but we don’t care. It’s still pretty cool.
Afternoon Tea
When we arrive at the Doria Hotel, we see a notice that there will be tea served in the afternoon.
Europe time is easier to read than US time.
So, we are thinking, “When is the last time we’ve enjoyed afternoon tea in Sweden?” Since we’ve never been to Sweden before, we decide the answer is “never”, and realize we must change that.
At the Dorsia Hotel, “tea” includes champagne.
We are seated near works of art (as if that could have been avoided). Four glasses of jellies and marmalades await suitable breads.
Tea for two.
This is just an artsy photograph.
A stack of snacks.
Food is served, unorthodoxically, of course. A selection of breads, meats, vegetables, and fruits awaits us. It might not look like a lot of food, but it is.
Assortments of sweets.
If you are the kind of person who likes to taste a little bit of everything, Afternoon Tea is for you.
Dressed to the tea.
One must always look one’s best at tea, mustn’t one?
Maybe we should split it.
A lot of work went into making this confection. It seems like I should take small bites and stretch out the enjoyment. Nope.
Teetotalers.
We ask one of the staff to take a photograph of us, and she obliges. And now you can see why it’s important to bring fine attire when traveling: you never know when you’ll be enjoying afternoon tea.
Speaking of staff, right before going to West Pride (covered in our next article), I ask one of the staff to pose with me.
Smile!
Her hair matches my tie. It’s like we planned this!
But, we didn’t.
Bubble Bath
There is no sense in having a huge golden bathtub if you don’t use it.
It’s not a bubble bath without bubbles.
If one is to travel to far-off Göteborg, Sweden, one must avail one’s self of the local amenities. It would be rude not to.
Fruit: the perfect food when bubble batheing.
Based on my own experience, foods such as pork chops and bacon bits make for poor bubble batheing food. Rather, stick with foods that are sweet and succulent. Like my fruit.
We must be sanitary, mustn’t we?
It is important to wash things before they are eaten. Thus, I take a moment to submerge my treats in the bubbles.
In for a penny, in for a Krona.
My fruit is now wet and clean. You can tell by my smile.
My fruit is frothy.
When the fruit is clean and frothy, it is time to eat!
The Grapes of Bath.
Grapes are just little tasty hairless balls filled with delight.
Sweet kisses.
It’s important to enjoy the moment and play with the grapes.
Pure juicy pleasure.
After playing with the clean green grapes, I suck them until they pop, then drink the sweet nectar. Yum!
A fish out of water.
I have a small green fish. Some people like to bite them, but not me.
Sometimes it’s okay to suck.
I prefer to suck them, letting the sweet juice roll down my throat. Sometimes I have to suppress my gag reflex, but that is just part of taking a bubble bath!
More fishies!
I have a yellow fish, too! It’s bigger, and I like that.
Bite, but not too hard.
Sometimes I like to rub my teeth on the fish, and bite it ever so gently. That makes it more receptive to what’s coming next.
Don’t waste a perfectly good tongue.
At this point, the fish is ready for a final licking before sliding juicily down my throat. It’s a little sloppy, but everything here is wet, so it doesn’t matter.
Time to dry off.
My bubble bath ends, but I am still hot and wet. I wonder what I should do about that….
The History of the Dorsia Hotel
To find out more about the history of the Dorsia Hotel, check out “Sophus Petersen’s Testament“.
Stolthet!
Join us next time as we visit West Pride, “an art and culture festival in Göteborg, Sweden created by and for homosexuals, bisexuals, transgender people, queer people and more.”